Watch out Bridezilla

This blog site is the brain child of five people in a S.U.V. hating on a wedding. In light of that I would like to state my disdain for weddings in general. It is not so much the "getting married" part that I hate (usually there is free booze and cheesy music). If peeps wanna wed that's their prerogative. What I hate is a societal culture that uses guilt and manipulation to coerce people into marital unions. If you are in a relationship than you know that the perennial question of "so when are you two going to get married" is a dreaded one if you are not engaged. Although I am often temped to say "never" I don't actually have the balls to say it. So-the-fuck-what...I don't want to get married. Here's why.

I don't need my government condoning my relationship. I don't need society to tell me, "now it's okay that you two are living together and having sex". I can make that decision on my own. My commitment to my boyfriend/partner is all my own. We are faithful. We are respectful. We love each other. No piece of paper needs to tell me that I feel these things. What is the most fucked up about it is that if one of us were severely injured the other wouldn't be able to visit or have any sort of rights. I'd much prefer my boyfriend have to make the DNR decision than my family. He knows me the best but with out that piece of paper he can't.

So am I supposed to feel guilty for living in "sin". Honestly, do we really need an omnipresent all knowing Deity (that may or may not be fictional) to tell us how to be good people? Shouldn't we be able to make moral decisions on our own free will? If there is a god and if that god can't tell that I am a good person living my life in a fruitful way than that god doesn't seem so great to me.

So if I have no god to please and don't want to subject my relationship to imperialist patriarchal societal standards than what is the fucking point of getting married?

Maybe it's to have a day that's completely devoted to me playing pretty pretty princess. A day to showcase how happy I am. A day to rub my relationship in the noses of my family and friends. No thanks. Narcissism turns me off. As far as my relationship is concerned everyday should be an affirmation of my love and commitment. Having one mega day seems to detract from that sentiment.

plus there is the issue of biology. Human beings are animals. I can't guarantee that I won't ever want to...you know....with some one else. No one can. It's biologically impossible. This might seem pessimistic but often pessimism and honesty go hand in hand.

People treat getting married as if it is some kind of accomplishment. They look at the size of the engagement ring as if it directly correlates to how much your spouse loves you. Materialism should not be a factor in marriage at all. The wedding becomes more of a show than an expression of love between two people. Anyone can get married. Not everyone can stay in a sustained long lasting relationship. Not everyone wants to be in a sustained long lasting relationship. Our culture has created a box for us that it wants us to neatly fit into but this box goes against our human biology and doesn't factor in the "different strokes for different folks" idea. It assumes that everyone wants to get married. It assumes that those who aren't in relationships desire to be in relationships. Marriage isn't the be all end all...and it isn't necessary.

Not to mention that weddings seem overly forced, overly rehearsed, and nauseatingly sterile.

Maybe I'll get married some day. Who knows. But if I do it will have more to do with necessity than desire. Plus is will in all probability have pyrotechnics, dirt bikes, truckzilla, and acrobatics.