Thursday, December 18, 2008

Fuck some mother fucking fuckin' hater ass hate.

Why hate?  Let's rap this year up in style peeps...turn a new leaf?  Change the stride?  Flip the script?

Liking is the new hating in 09'.  But then again....i'm on some 2010 shit already!


Monday, December 15, 2008

4 and 20; Even if I loved Weed, that would not Rule

I just watched the Minnesota Timberwolves blow a game; surprised? Not fucking me. They were down 53-50 to the hated Sacramento Kings at the half, who don't even get a bold up in heahre (they hold it down ok with my peeps), and then they lost the game by oh, 20, 17, 25? Guess it was only 15 points, but the Kings suck!

I'm getting tenuously close to fully saying "Fuck the Minnesota Timberwolves and their family and their family pets and I wish I could give up on you motherfuckers like I should give up on that chick that I only see at parties and we've made out like twice and she gave me that blowjob once but it didn't work, and all fucking that." I don't actually have a chick like that in my life, but the T-Wolves seem like they're that chick and the time she/the team gave me that blowjob was in the 03-04 season, so it really doesn't even fucking matter anymore does it?

Dear Mr. Gerbik,

The Timberwolves, at best, were a cock tease some four years ago. Their only saving grace, that dude KG, left you and them long ago and he's kind of ended up kind of being a dick anyways. Get over it. It's not the same anymore, and even if you think the team is going to see you at the party and remember the time that you once hooked up, remember, it wasn't that good anyways, and that the team is totally a different team than you remember. It's worn out, paradoxically younger, less enxperienced, and the blow job is going to be worse than before, not like that's even going to happen.

Love, Mr. Gerbik's Brain

A Step Forward?

We at the HPC have, in the past, addressed the oddity that is mannequin design. I recently came across this fellow in a sporting goods store in Chicago. Now, I'm not going to draw any conclusions, but I'd like to ask a few questions:

1. Is this mannequin meant to look like someone of African decent?

2. If so, is it a good thing or a bad thing that its being used to display athletic apparel?

3. Furthermore, assuming it is meant to look like someone of African decent, is the intention to appeal to black consumers, or is it an attempt to pump some racial equality into what is otherwise a form designed primarily in the mold of caucasians, thereby appealing to those who are more PC-minded?

4. Where else, if anywhere, are we seeing 'ethnic'-looking mannequins?

To give these questions a bit of context, I should point out that this particular sporting goods store is located in the Lakeview neighborhood. To get an idea of the racial and ethnic breakdown in the this area, look under the "Demographics - Race" column.

I could be reading too deeply into this, but I can't help but be reminded of this.

Monday, November 17, 2008

His Holy Princeness

So I am supposed to be working, but I was getting stressed so I went to one of my favorite websites, Jezebel...and was psyched to get sucked into the following article.  Just do it, click the link!  It's titled "Prince: How Prince Went From "P*ssy Control" To Puritanical Proselytizing" 


and then...

Click HERE.  Now, I'm not a huge Perez Hilton fan, but if people are going to hate on Prince they better get their facts straight.  According to Perez the New Yorker done fucked up.  Read it.

Anyone feel like going to the Front?

Saturday, November 15, 2008

I was staying up late this Friday night into Saturday morning and ended up watching This American Life on the TV, but on the internet. The first section, the opening section, was about dudes that ride horses in Philadelphia proper, and I'd found some parallel between that and skateboarding, and wanted to post it on the primary, that being Platinum. The screen shot above is what I'd thought about posting on Plat; what the real meat and potatoes of the episode is fully not Plat worthy.

Simply, plan on hammering out 30 minutes of your day to watch the episode of This American Life that I just watched; Part One, and Part Two, right there at them links. The general theme is escapes, and while skateboarding worked with the horse aspect, I found the second part was completely it's own deal, heck, we love on here too. It's hard to know what else to even type; the second things got going I was rapt and sucked in, you will be too. If you haven't clicked those links yet, just know that they will question your own sense of existence, and raise a whole load of questions beyond that. It's truly amazing, and Ira Glass really has something going. Just watch the clips man.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Wassup...To Hope?

2.5 million views, so maybe you've seen this. I know that I saw it on a ton of different sites, and never peeped it, so I suggest you do now. It's the Budweiser "Wassup" guys in the future, which is now. The end might tickle your brain; it did mine. I'm white-knuckling for a week here.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Read this.  Then wonder what is going on?  I think I asked on my blog...but is anyone still interested in seeing this with me?  The debt clock, which was erected less than 20 years ago, when our country had less than $3tn in debt, now has to have 2 digits added next year, because we have over $10tn in debt.  In fewer than 20 years our national debt has increased by almost $7 trillion (with a T) dollars.  Damn.

The Situation I Am In?

Oh, another night spent fumbling around the internet, another aimless night looking at Hater Party Crew and realizing that, as of the past couple of months, I've had absolutely nothing to hate on. Or hate with. Or hate, otherwise.

Politics are the easiest to hate; Sarah Palin being the easiest and most obvious target. And yet she failed to flounder in the debate. Essentially, the political edge is gone, Obama is up in the polls, and with that I'm generally happy with life, in general (if there's something to hate on, but not really, I should just say, "Hey, call me back.").

What I stumbled upon to post about was regarding something found on, regarding a twenty-something close to my age but not necessarily in my own situation. Or closer to me than I want to let on, or admit. Who knows?; some better than others. To quote, and it's a link:

But though they are also out of college with careers now, the people I’ve been hanging around with thrive on more of an extended adolescence: empty flirtation with Barbie at the trendy nightspots, beer pong, ’80s iPod playlists, making fun of each other, and lounging in gym clothes in front of video games, Judd Apatow movies and ESPN. I do wish I could now claim some of the shameless, irresponsible, mainstream fun that my serious relationship kept in check, but on the other hand, there was a reason I never wanted to join a frat … I can escape from that scene in some satisfying ways — practicing the piano, having an occasional co-workers happy hour, getting back into riding my bicycle and playing tennis, and reading, reading, reading — but none are opportunities to start friendships with cooler people.

Read the entire link and find that the writer finds that his current friends circle is far too adolescent or college-like for him. It's a problem for sure, mostly. I looked at this and thought:

Oh!, an ode to my friends. We make fun of each other and use recent Presidential Debate references to do so! Crude jokes about the SS are not only understood as crude and distasteful but also as funny and historically referenced. Placenta tacos? I don't want to eat that shit because I know what placenta is. Basically, my friends are smart, well read, up on current events, artistic, stylish, childish, nerdy, lazy (at times), petty, and generally awesome.

It seems like the writer of the "help letter" could fit in with us, and us know who us is, if only dude took himself a little less seriously. You know?

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Pitbull Hockey Moms Need Love Too

Like many liberal-minded Americans, I think Sarah Palin is two banjo-strings away from being Deliverance-style crazy. Here's another example of the whacky hoo-doo this woman gets herself into. Read the article below the video link, it gives shortcuts to the really good parts.

And if you're as irked as I am over this woman's painfully outdated views about abortion rights, rape victim protection and single mother care, have a look at the following (thanks Jeremy):

Want to put $5 to good use? Show opposition to Sarah Palin's stance on reproductive rights, denying sex education, cutting financial assistance to single mothers in Alaska and, my personal favorite, her policy in Wasilla, Alaska that required rape victims to pay for their own rape kits after being sexually assaulted. Seriously.

Here's the deal: When you make a donation (minimum req'd donation is $5) to Planned Parenthood in Sarah Palin's name, they'll mail her a card telling her that the donation has been made in her honor.

Here's the link to the Planned Parenthood website:

You'll need to fill in the address to let Planned Parenthood know where to send the "In Sarah Palin's honor" card. I suggest you use the address for the McCain campaign headquarters, which is:

McCain for President
Attn.Sarah Palin
1235 S.Clark Street
1st Floor
Arlington , VA 22202

P.S.Make sure you use that link above or choose the pulldown of Donate--Honorary or Memorial Donations, not the regular "Donate Online"

This is gonna be so good. And I don't know about anyone else, but I can't wait to see the VP debates between her and Biden. It will be the very definition of a verbal smackdown. I mean, there's no way that this chick is going to be able to keep pace with a career politician who has chaired the Foreign Relations Committee and the Senate Judiciary Committee, and who so savagely stripped down Supreme Court nominee Robert Bork that the latter now has an unflattering word named after him. Palin's in for a world of pain.

Friday, September 5, 2008


causing dismay or horror: an appalling accident; an appalling lack of manners.

[Origin: 1810–20; appall + -ing2]

ap·pall·ing·ly, adverb

Monday, September 1, 2008

Really? I mean really?

Lauren called me this morning and asked if I wanted to come over for brunch. I was debating whether I should bike or drive...but after a walk to Lund's I decided to drive (I'm sorry...but the humidity is stifling right now and my legs and back are killing me). On my way home from Lauren's I was driving through downtown Minneapolis and came across a bike sharing station set up by Freewheelin. They set up the same thing in Denver for the DNC, and the goal was to get 25,000 miles ridden on these free-to-use bikes between both conventions...I guess the hit 26,xxx in they're getting their point across, which is great.

So why the post on HPC?

As I was driving past (what I think is a very good idea) I noticed a Cadillac Escalade blocking traffic in the right lane. They were pulled over to let a few people out, all of whom were wearing Freewheelin these people are either employees or volunteers of the bike share group. WHY, Sirs, are you then driving around in an Escalade! I guarantee your hotel is in downtown Minneapolis...and even if for some off-chance it's in St. Paul - do you really need an Escalade? The .9 carbon footprint reduction I saw lit on the big promotion board has been erased by your ridiculous need to floss. ick. I commented on their blog, but the comments need to be approved before they are posted...can't wait to see if I get the
green light.

Sidenote: I think I saw that 10,000 some miles had already been ridden in MPLS...if that is true (and not a misread on my part...that's fucking tits.)

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Pandering: A New Definition There Of

Hello Sarah Palin, and eventually, goodbye to some political adviser who just ruined their career by recommending that Mrs. Palin should be the GOP running mate.

That's enough up there pretty much, bet a second rhetorical is so much more fun. What's it gonna be America? Vote against the Black Man or the White Woman? Is that how this will be decided? Who's just not going to show up on election day? I can see it now...

At least I can give it to McCain for being bold, though in a rather insincere way. I can truly say that I have no goddamn clue as to what's going to happen this November. It's tantalizing and scary really, my fingers are crossed.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Fuck a Dude That...

Fuck a dude who's so drunk at 12 A.M. on a Friday night that he stops his Jeep Cheroke at the intersection of First Ave. and 5th street, stumbles out (barely), with door open begins pissing in the street, when car approaches and stops next to man all he does is point like he's scoring a touch-down, then gets back in his truck and peels out across First Ave almost hitting a car who's turning left, then has to screech to a halt at the end of the block to not hit (again) the car ahead of him parked at the red light.

Fuck that dude.

Joe Biden and a Semester Wasting

I just sat through the first day of classes today, and through all the first day stupid questions and all that shit (aside: they managed to register for classes and or to be accepted to school and they're asking that question!?), we also went over the whole plagiarism thing for all four of my classes. That got me thinking about Senator Joe Biden and his recent ascension to VP Candidate and something that I read today, I think.

I never knew this, but Biden ran for President in 1988. And I definitely didn't know that he exited the race after he was called out for multiple proven cases of plagiarism. Further reading here (full disclosure: I haven't read that article yet). So just when is McCain going to pounce on this? And when is the rest of the media barring Slate going to remind the general public of this? The true essence of Obamamania will be put to the test with the latter question. And the question remains, as posed in the first article; how much does it still matter? While I'd love to know, it won't affect my vote.

As a final thought for the other posters on this blog, myself included, let's not go another month neglecting our little blog baby. Summer is pretty much over, so there's gonna be plenty of hate to go around. I just hope us people are still even checking this thing. Love, where you at (in general and in life too, call me!)?

Edit: I went back and read the second article that I'd linked to and it noted far more egregious acts of plagiarism on Biden's part. It seems to have started in college. I've never ever understood those that can blatantly lie about themselves, especially when aspects of it can easily be dis-proven, as in Bidens' case. Whether it represents insecurity regarding said liar, or simply an attitude of "by any means necessary," both are rather telling.

As stated, I like(d?) Biden. He's real enough to escape the simple tag of typical politician and maybe unscrupulous enough to regain that tag. As long as a departure from our current shitty path is something that the Dems will continue to stick to, I'm still voting Obama this fall. Running mates don't matter anyways, right?

Tuesday, July 29, 2008


I have had enough heart attacks in the past two weeks - I really, really, really didn't need another one. But guess what? Life doesn't work like that, does it.

If anyone knows anyone who is hiring for anything right now please let me know. I'm dead serious. And if you know anyone hiring for anything in Chicago let John know. And if you know anyone hiring in NYC let me know.

So yeah.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Check Yourself. Don't Wreck Yourself.

So as it turns out I am not a "music festival" type person. Guess sun+portable toilets+large crowds+asshole douche's who can't get their acts together long enough to aim into a urinal+ long lines+ greasy stomach rupturing festival food+ a lame "no re-entry policy+ out door acoustics (or lack there of)= epic harshness of ginormous proportions (I'll note here that I was the only one in my group that had a less than fantastic time). I'll wasn't all bad. There was some stellar peep watching. Check out fashion from Chicago's finest Pitchfork attendees. (I would have added captions but just in case there is a Hell I decided not to)

Monday, July 21, 2008

Thank you. I was hoping somebody was going to say something.

I need to say "Thank You" to Brooke Hogan. Thanks to her fucking stupid ass mouth the women's suffrage movement has been pushed back another twenty years. Please read below to find out what I'm talking about...

"You know what? I am actually not that much into voting. I think it’s kinda crazy that a woman is running, because I think that women deal with a lot of emotions and menopause and PMS and stuff. Like, I’m so moody all the time, I know I couldn’t be able to run a country, ‘cause I’d be crying one day and yelling at people the next day, ya know?"
- Brooke Hogan

Now I'll be honest, I found this quote on which doesn't make me proud. But I am happy that I found it. I like to know what I'm working against...and she is definitely one of the things that I'm working against in this world. It actually pains me that a woman in this day and age would say such a thing. I'm not so oblivious to believe that celebrities have any kind of clout with most of the world (or maybe they do and I just choose not to associate with those types of people) but I do think they should have some sense of social responsibility. If they can't say something worthwhile they should just be muzzled.

Friday, July 18, 2008

Parent Hate

Not only am I sick of looking at a gigantic "Lobster" picture but I also have a legitimate, life shattering hate sesh built up inside of me. I have always felt that I do not have a right to judge parents of "out of control" children due to the simple fact that I myself am not a parent. That was until last Monday. I had a brief yet life shattering encounter with a Satan spawn that changed how I view parenting forever. As most of you may (of may not) know I am a waitress. Waitressing in and of itself involves frequently being in uncomfortable, humbling, awkward, and humiliating situations. This one takes the cake. Is the big Kahuna. Relentlessly goes for the gold.

Monday night I was waiting on a table that consisted of two adults and one child of about three or four. Mid dinner I stopped by to check in and see how their apps were treating them only to be mercilessly pelted in the eye by a large sopping wet spitball napkin wad. To add insult to injury the parents did absolutely nothing with exception to saying the child's name loudly (when did hearing your name loud become punishment?). No apology. Not even a 20% tip. I was so enraged and humiliated that I made my boss finish up the table. Later on in the evening as the family was finishing up the child threw more stuff at me as I was quickly passing by with my head down in shame. Again, his name said loudly was the only punishment. I literally had to go to the bathroom to pick chunks of napkin out of my eye and the only punishment he received was his name said loudly. To top it all off the woman is pregnant (with presumably another spawn of Satan). Why do these people procreate? If you can't control your kid in public don't take it out in public. If you don't want to be a disciplinarian don't become a parent.

I do not choose to be a waitress because I want to baby sit. If you are going to exist in a public place be respectful of the life around you.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Lobster, King Daddy, and/or Sporos...

You know what I'm talking about. Possibly the most terrifying creature I've ever encountered in real life. One of the only things that makes me scream like a little girl and run away.

I've started to conquer my fear of the Lobster, and now I usually attack them with some sort of cleaning supply or if I can't find that fast enough I will swat them with a shoe or magazine. I will never, under any circumstances touch them with my bare skin (I'm never going to be that brave john). So even though I'm getting over my fear...I still hate these things with a passion. I actually had to cover the picture up with my hand when I was uploading it. Fuck.

Monday, June 30, 2008

HPC certified: Public Passion

A plug for this other blog-o-mine, or better yet, one that I just started and invited half of the HPC to already. Public Passion. Cha'll know what to do. The amazingness above was in Union Square; a handjob for sure at one point, and someone mentioned they just might have been having sexual intercourse. Cho-ass? You decide. Um, ignore the fact that PP and HPC have the same layout. Ok? Cool.

Friday, June 20, 2008


I'm currently reading a book about the medieval crusades and I have to say how frustrating it is. "It" being the fact that there have been physical and intellectual battles about faith and more specifically religion for thousands of years. The current world climate is a testament to the fact that people are crazy and these battles will never end. Look at what this kook of a "science" teacher did to a student. He should have no opportunity to challenge the ruling.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

One Proper Hater: Chris Hitchens

Our boy Chris Hitchens is down to call bullshit bullshit, and hate on things with such eloquence that all haters should take note. Point in case, in a past HPC post I talked about Hillary Clinton and how she got the short end of the stick on things in the presidential race. Well, Hitchens sets the record straight. Word.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

omg fuck off lol

fuck you you fucking pop punk loving, stupid hair having, completely unfuckingcool douches. you fucking poser hipsters. thats right. the shit you are trying to get into isn't even fucking cool. you're riding trends that have been played the fuck out since 05. just because you soldmerchthatonetime for that local band don't mean shit. just cause you went to a store opening and drank all the free fucking pbr you could then came to the triple rock only to stumble around like a fucking 16 year old who has had one too many wine coolers doesnt give you any clout.

first off that store you went to: its wack. how the fuck are you gonna sell some deadstock reebok pumps on a shelf right next to some overpriced track bike cages. Something seems a little off. Oh ya, and that dope event after, you know at the 3 rock, with the dope djs? ya that was some motherfuckers piggy backing an already established event. that dude you probly think is your friendbutinrealitydoesntrememberyourname who "runs" the shop did not set that shit up. he's just trying to dig his claws into whatever he can. and im not talking about some collaboration shit here. straight up copping steez. that dude can suck a dick. and so can you. make it his... wait, that already happened.

now lets talk about that band you're friends with. let me tell you something... they fucking suck. ya i know i know, they just got signed to insertindieimprintwithmajorlabelbackinghere, but that in itself is pretty lame. they are gonna get chewed up and spit out faster than one of the underage girls at your "parties". and i'll tell you why. they are copping shit that the people who originally came up with have moved so far beyond. they are ripping off bands who rip off bands.
let me tell you something, i don't care that you are "friends" that band. i don't care about the time you went to wendys with them and paid for all of it. i dont care that they took you on tour and you loaded all their gear for them at every show. they made you their bitch, cause that is what you are... a bitch.

and do me a favor, when you're telling all your friends about this siiiick party you went to, please dont tell them you were the king of the dance floor. i saw you. when you weren't outside smokingbutnotinhaling, sure you were on the dance floor, but standing on the outside of a wackasfuck breakdance circle looking like an asshole does not equal dancing.

so in conclusion, fuck off. you are not cool. you are not doing cool shit. you are not into cool shit. you are a fucking clown. stay the fuck inside at your little house parties. you are a embarrassment to our city you fucking douche nozzle.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

The triple double tonight will have a triple threat. Watch out fools because we will be hating on you in person. Don't get me wrong...there's a lot of love to go around, but if you aren't in the mix get ready for some haterade in your faceplate.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Our News Media Is Great!

Why is it that I can find out what Brad Pitt is spending his money on the day after he does it, but I can't seem to be able to watch the speech Barack Obama gave last night without a fucking headache?

And how, as a major media source, do you cut in a quarter of the way through said speech, to give your two cents on it, and then about an hour later, run a program like TMZ tv. Without interruption?

Friday, May 30, 2008

Two Missed Dinners and a case of Herpangina

So happenstance strikes again. Random run-in with Lauren from Fobia days-past was fantastic this last weekend. A party, a huge lunch, a bbq, a was on. It all lead to an invite from her to her place for dinner last night. Good thing I had to work. It was fantastic drinking kalimotxos and watching her prepare everything. It was a little bit of a let-down to have to leave her place literally as she was pulling the amazing looking dish out of the oven. C'est la vie. Consolation prize - a cherry galette which she sent with me...and I devoured for breakfast.

So anyway, left the dinner party to head to a Beast House party which was rad. And there was food. Thank god or I might have lost it. Went out for work until a little after 1 and was raging hungry. Guess what? Conveniently received a text message at 12:59 which read "I'll get u chinese food today" so I'm hyped. Chinese food? Love it. Today? Even better...I already missed one dinner. I would like a back-up dinner, I mean, who wouldn't? So I drive myself over to Uptown only to find myself with no chinese dinner. Appararently there are no chinese food places open at 2:00am on a Thursday night. Why this would be is pretty much not making sense to me. I would have paid at least $8 for chinese food at 2:00am. $9 if there would have been hot and sour soup. Instead I paid $7 for a Jack's pizza and a turkey and brie sandwich from Kowalskis.

Then, this morning, EC informs me that his boss, the wife of his boss, and he thinks he - have herpangina. That's right. Herpangina. Guess what? Herpangina is not a VD. It's not herpes. It has nothing to do with your gina. It's some weird sore throat thing that gives you blisters on your hands and feet. What the fuck? I'm moving off the couch. Contamination is my fear. Herpangina is it's name. I would also like to point out that the cause of herpangina is Coxsackievirus. Yeah - you read that right. Cox-sack-ievirus. This shit is made up.

The past 12 hours have been insane.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Whatever gets you to sleep at night

Now that the only person who thinks that Hilary Clinton can win the nomination is Hilary Clinton, Barack Obama is focusing his sights on garnering support with fence-riding Democrats. And the group that seems to be on the lips of all media hacks is the White Working Class, aka Reagan Democrats (a contradiction in terms that I enter as exhibit A for the case of why Americans are too stupid to deserve the vote).
Obama continually fails to get the vote of this group. In Oregon, around only 40% of WWCs voted for Obama, in Kentucky (no surprise here) it was less than 20%. Many have been quoted as saying they favor Hilary’s platform, and moreover, would rather vote for John McCain than Obama. Interesting. So, they prefer a moderately liberal president in Hilary Clinton, and barring that, they would rather a left-leaning Republican (whatever that means) who is constantly courting favor with the Neo-Cons. But just so we’re clear, this has nothing to do with race. It’s a matter of experience. Sure. That’s reasonable. And the general misconception that Obama is an elitist.
I love the fact that the black candidate, who has spent most of his professional career working with the working and lower-classes on the streets of Chicago, is the elitist. Not the Republican whose wife’s (albeit undisclosed) wealth is estimated in the hundreds of millions. And certainly not the candidate who grew up in fucking Park Ridge, Illinois (which is the archetype for Anytown, USA—it’s the suburbs personified), had a comfortable, upper-middle class upbringing, and has spent more than 20 million of her own money on her campaign. Nope, it’s Obama.
This bullshit is proof-positive that there are certain voters out there who simply aren’t comfortable with the idea of a black president, no matter how liberal they like to think they are. And interestingly enough, the WWCs aren’t alone. Just today, I was reading an article in the New York Times about retired Jewish Democrats in Florida (yes, they are still fucking it up for the rest of us) who plan to vote for McCain over Obama, because they don’t like Obama’s platform on relations with Israel. So, it’s a foreign-policy issue. Got it.
And a recent installation of Nightline reported how many liberal feminist groups are going to vote for McCain if Obama gets the nomination because they want Hilary to win. So, to follow that train of logic: if Hilary doesn’t get the nomination, feminists will vote for the Republican who waffles over Roe v. Wade depending on who’s fund-raising dinner he’s speaking at, in an effort to punish Obama for taking the nomination away from Hilary. (And apparently the next president will be appointing a new Supreme Court Justice. As things stand in the Supreme Court right now, one more conservative, Pro-Life judge is all that’s needed to repeal Roe v. Wade. But certain feminist groups are willing to risk it in order to teach us all that we should’ve voted for Hilary.) Right.
All of this obstinance in the face of reason can mean only one thing: we are still horribly racist in America. So much so, that people are willing to do things that actually go against what they supposedly want and desire, all in an effort to avoid a little extra melanin in the Oval Office. They can make a great case for foreign policy experience, being out of touch with working-class values, not having a uterus…but it’s all lip-service to their supposed color-blind, P.C. self-perception. The truth is they’re looking for any excuse not to vote for Obama. I just wish these people would have the balls (ovaries in the feminists’ case?) to tell it like it is: “I’m a racist piece of shit and I don’t want a black president.”

It's called hell...and I've been there.


Don't even bother going to any of the above listed towns. They have all been banned from my life. Don't try getting to them, don't have fun while you're there, and don't try to escape once they've got their claws around'll only end up driving your life away. Just stay out of them and you'll be fine.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

I heart my bicycle...SAVBAG

So these dudes are pretty much one of the elements of the world that just confuse me. Do they really think I believe them when they say they don't recall their personal earnings in 2007? Can they honestly stand before Congress, sworn in, and claim that they have no good explanation for sky-rocketing fuel prices? And that the simple fact that their company's profits have increased at ridiculous rates over the past five years?

These dudes are a-holes. Not because they're rich, not because they run oil companies, not because they aren't investing in reusable fuels - but because they are willing to stand up there and lie about something so obvious. Just say it! "We made a shit ton of money last year, and guess why? It's because we own something people want and need."

My hate is two-fold. These dudes are obvious. But I'd also like to hate/criticize on everyone who contributes to this problem (self included) and then just bitches. All of the miles driven by American's in their cars, trucks, SUVs, etc are absurd. The simple idea of carpooling, busing, walking, or riding a bicycle is so foreign to most Americans it's actually unbelievable. Do I think these options are best in all situations? No, of course not. But do I know, without a doubt in my mind, that I've made many a useless trip in my car when I could have walked, biked, bused, or called a friend who was going to the same spot and driven together? I'm just saying. SAVBAG is taking over. (Saint Anthony Village Bike Association Gang). Ride it.