I’ve recently noticed a disturbing trend in our society: the quality of the lies we are told. Maybe it’s just me, but I have noticed a sharp decline in the caliber of bullshit I’m being fed. I won’t hazard a guess as to why this is, although I’m sure it’s a trend at least five years in the making (WMD’s anyone?).
I remember a time, not too long ago, when I would really have to work my noodle to determine whether someone was lying to me. And even when I had my hunches, I was left with little hard evidence to back myself up. Of late, I’ve been lied to in such flagrant ways, I find myself being less upset about the lying itself, and more upset about how obvious the lie was.
I’ll give you an example. I work for a promotions company, and I’ve got several people that work under me. The job requires that my employees work by them selves, at night, unsupervised (for the most part). So my people are given a lot of freedom and trust, and it’s my job to ensure that they aren’t abusing that independence. I’ve got this one guy who was supposed to work last Saturday. He came into the office the following Monday, and all his paperwork was inaccurate. It suggested that something was rotten in Denmark. After doing only a scant bit of investigatory work, I realized that he hadn’t worked at all on Saturday. I was upset that this guy felt he could pull a fast one and get some money for nothing (to quote perennial favorites, Dire Straits). What upset me even more was that he couldn’t be bothered to come up with a really airtight lie. His lie was so flimsy that I saw through it right away. It was insulting.
I’ve had employees lie to me in the past, and at times, it was like putting together a federal court case. I had to get eyewitnesses, build a tower of evidence, and argue a hard case. I had this fool dead to rights after two phone calls. How stupid does this guy think I am? I mean, I’ve fished my way out of Bullshit Lake on more than one occasion, but I always made it a point to fabricate a decent lie. Maybe I didn’t respect the person enough to tell them the truth, but at least I respected them enough to tell them something palatable.
I’ve come to realize, this whole situation has opened a much larger wound for me. We have been lied to time and time again by our current Bastard in Chief. And just like my employee, he can’t even be bothered to come up with a half-way believable lie. The modern world is a trying place. We are constantly bombarded with so much information about people and things that have nothing to do with us. It’s hard to filter all this content; to feel fear or sorrow or sympathy for situations that have no bearing on our personal lives. “My heart goes out to that baby stuck in a well, but what can I do?” “I sure wish they would stop systematically raping women in Darfur.” “Wouldn’t it be nice if we stopped spending more money on “Defense” than on Education, Welfare and Healthcare COMBINED.”
So we are already left feeling helpless, possibly hopeless, and this cocksucker John Wayne’s his way into the White House, only to spit shit in our ears. It’s bad enough that we have to digest all the world’s ills with no recourse, but now we have to swallow our president’s lies. And they’re not even good lies. They’re not even well-substantiated lies. They’re the kind of flimsy, 2-cent lies you tell yourself because you’re scared and desperate. “Sure I’m spending three grand a week on coke, but I can quit anytime I want.” “I know this guy’s dick is in my mouth, but I really love my wife.” “Iraq is in possession of weapons of mass destruction.”
I’m not saying we need to act like adults and be honest with one another. Adults aren’t honest. No, we need to use our adult brains and tell really good lies. It’s just the decent thing to do.
I remember a time, not too long ago, when I would really have to work my noodle to determine whether someone was lying to me. And even when I had my hunches, I was left with little hard evidence to back myself up. Of late, I’ve been lied to in such flagrant ways, I find myself being less upset about the lying itself, and more upset about how obvious the lie was.
I’ll give you an example. I work for a promotions company, and I’ve got several people that work under me. The job requires that my employees work by them selves, at night, unsupervised (for the most part). So my people are given a lot of freedom and trust, and it’s my job to ensure that they aren’t abusing that independence. I’ve got this one guy who was supposed to work last Saturday. He came into the office the following Monday, and all his paperwork was inaccurate. It suggested that something was rotten in Denmark. After doing only a scant bit of investigatory work, I realized that he hadn’t worked at all on Saturday. I was upset that this guy felt he could pull a fast one and get some money for nothing (to quote perennial favorites, Dire Straits). What upset me even more was that he couldn’t be bothered to come up with a really airtight lie. His lie was so flimsy that I saw through it right away. It was insulting.
I’ve had employees lie to me in the past, and at times, it was like putting together a federal court case. I had to get eyewitnesses, build a tower of evidence, and argue a hard case. I had this fool dead to rights after two phone calls. How stupid does this guy think I am? I mean, I’ve fished my way out of Bullshit Lake on more than one occasion, but I always made it a point to fabricate a decent lie. Maybe I didn’t respect the person enough to tell them the truth, but at least I respected them enough to tell them something palatable.
I’ve come to realize, this whole situation has opened a much larger wound for me. We have been lied to time and time again by our current Bastard in Chief. And just like my employee, he can’t even be bothered to come up with a half-way believable lie. The modern world is a trying place. We are constantly bombarded with so much information about people and things that have nothing to do with us. It’s hard to filter all this content; to feel fear or sorrow or sympathy for situations that have no bearing on our personal lives. “My heart goes out to that baby stuck in a well, but what can I do?” “I sure wish they would stop systematically raping women in Darfur.” “Wouldn’t it be nice if we stopped spending more money on “Defense” than on Education, Welfare and Healthcare COMBINED.”
So we are already left feeling helpless, possibly hopeless, and this cocksucker John Wayne’s his way into the White House, only to spit shit in our ears. It’s bad enough that we have to digest all the world’s ills with no recourse, but now we have to swallow our president’s lies. And they’re not even good lies. They’re not even well-substantiated lies. They’re the kind of flimsy, 2-cent lies you tell yourself because you’re scared and desperate. “Sure I’m spending three grand a week on coke, but I can quit anytime I want.” “I know this guy’s dick is in my mouth, but I really love my wife.” “Iraq is in possession of weapons of mass destruction.”
I’m not saying we need to act like adults and be honest with one another. Adults aren’t honest. No, we need to use our adult brains and tell really good lies. It’s just the decent thing to do.
No comments:
Post a Comment