I'm gonna be real. Can I? Oh wait, I'm posting and you can't so I'm gonna whether you are feeling it or not.
Ok...first off. What? No one has anything they need to get off their chest anymore? Did everyone get all happy-go-lucky as last year wound down to a close? I'm here with some serious positivity and shit, but for real, something's urking me and I'm 'bouts to unload a full clip of hate on you fuckers.
1. I don't ever, EVER, EVER want to hear the phrase "social media" ever again. NOT ever. Not if it was the key to the holy grail. FUCK "SOCIAL MEDIA". Just call it facebook for fuck's sake. Ok, call it facebook AND twitter. What else is there? No one is on myspace anymore, and if you are, i'm sorry for you. (bands are ok still). Then what else we got? They're not counting texting, or emailing (the experts that is). So...you've got facebook and twitter. 2 things....not 1. Fuck Social Media. Fuck it to death.
2.) Since I'm ranting about a phrase...let's break it down to 2 of my other least favorite words of the last year. The "r" word and the "e" word. Yep...you know the ones. YES YOU DO!. "Recession" and "Economy" can go ahead and fuck themselves too. Seriously. Dear aforementioned words, please suck a dick and fuck yourselves. Maybe the collective fucktards that make up the mass consuming public would feel a little bit better about buying that 3rd big screen TV for the kitchen breakfast nook if the media wasn't face fucking them with how shitty things are and how it's never gonna end and and and and and and....
maybe. just maybe.
3.) Also, I hate dropping my keys. A LOT.
4.) Taking more than 1 trip. I.E. carrying groceries from the car to the house...or something like that. I'd rather struggle, loose my breath carrying 60 lbs up 19 stairs than go down them once more to get that last bag I decided to wait for. Fuck that. I hate 2 trips.
5.) Doors slamming. MY DOOR slamming. Everyone knows it slams who's ever been over there. I've even probably mentioned to everyone 3 or more times as they walked into or out of "don't let the door slam". Still, it slams. I'm gonna start going to everyone's house just pop on over unexpected. Come to the door. Invite myself in. Slam the door, then proceed to walk out, slam it again...and go home. Maybe i'll make it a double header and go to another friend's house.