Monday, January 26, 2009

Truck Balls, a Familia Sticker, and a Smucker Sticker.

Where is my nuts? Right fucking here dawg. Let's quote:
Thank You America For a Wonderful Year!!!

Did you have an awesome customer experience?
Do you have a sweet picture of your Nutz?

I don't even know what else to say. Do these rule? Yes? Can I inexpensively order a, um, uh, a pair? YES! Can I get mine in black? The only thing to say here about these eight inches of awesomeness is BOO-YA!!!. Put those dogs in a bathtub.

Monday, January 19, 2009

Let's Talk, or better yet, Let's Hate. We Could Party...

Did the Hater Party Crew breakup and I didn't get the email, or see the post,, get the text message, or get the call, or get the letter? A letter being sent is very unlikely, I know for a fact that no HPC member has my address, in fact I'm pretty sure that only my Dad, Kevin Wilkins, and GEICO, and the electric company, and the bank have my actual addy. So there wasn't a letter or anything, but really, I'm down a rabbit hole that doesn't lead to my point. I continue.

What is the state of this hating community? I know that the previous post, which I will not link to because you can simply scroll down, somewhat esoterically posited whether or not, "Liking is the new hating in 09'?," but then old Typo' talked about some future shit so I have a feeling that we still might be hating. There is a point, I swear.

I might just be with the rest of ya'll; I'm fairly content with my lot in life, and at the same time, this whole winter thing is sapping all creative energy i.e. hating juice out of me. But I mean, to be frank, fuck all dat bullshit, we can still rule the hatoshphere, as we damn well should be. Take some time and peruse the Renaissance of HPC, aka April of 2008; we killed it! Smart, entertaining hating by all, a little party, a smattering of liking, etc. We still got it folks; if we don't I have to move HPC out of my bookmark bar in favor of what? (checking), oh boring, my TSM login page; cha'll know if you ever check my blog there that I don't update that shit.

So a point, shall we? Could we keep partying, hating, or liking even? Yes we can, Yes We Can. We all still hate on stuff, even if we don't immediately post it on the internet. Here we go, some possible hate content for the '09, where liking might be the new hating but we're in the future so we don't even know up from down (to paraphrase the post below). Yeah, the list of things to possibly hate this year...

-Teenagers. This will never change, and as we're a year older now, we'll probably hate them more.

-Winter. Old faithful; this one has been especially bad, so someone entertain me.

-Fedoras. I grudgingly hold my tongue when certain friends wear them, because they don't even look that bad, but, you, know, someone could get sparked.

-Long Droopy Beanies. Oh fuck yeah, we got this.

-Street Wear.

-Name Dropping Assholes. 2008 saw three posts devoted to a single dude, and one of our fine posters even felt compelled to create a new blogger name for his one-time-under-that-name-rant. We still got it in us.


-Politics. It's been all touchy feely and shit since November 2nd, but we're bound to find our hate again.

-The Economy? Almost a moot point at this point, but we're creative.

-Work. Duh.

-Life's Nasty Tricks. They happen, and e-venting is a viable solution, for a bit at least.

-Nicholas Cage.

-The Timberwolves. They're playing well now, but my inner-fan says I just might have another post in me about them.

-Facebook. That shit would write itself.

-Short People. They got no reason to life yo.

-Other blogs. Since this is so still the best thing ever on the internet, I know we can find something to ridicule.

-Dick Cheney. Some info about his sketchiness is bound (or not) to come to light soon, I know someone can tackle that dude (I personally would never tackle him, because I have the creeping suspicion that he has lighting strike capabilities ala THE EMPEROR). Again, digression.

-Blog post pep talks.

I'm out!